Caretakers need care too

Caring for a loved one in need can be one of the most rewarding and honorable things a person can do. It can also be one of the most challenging and demanding responsibilities an individual will ever face. Cherished moments and closer relationships can quickly be overshadowed by the shear magnitude and rigors of the responsibility.

Caregiving can suddenly become a source of frustration, worry and stress. This can come from numerous places, such as dealing with multiple doctors, trying to navigate a fragmented healthcare system, feeling isolated, experiencing tough decisions, and simply facing an unknown. All of this, at the same time as attending to the needs of your loved one, while trying to meet the demands of work, family and everyday life can quickly become overwhelming.

The stress associated with these duties can have serious consequences for the caregiver.

Consider this: A study of caregivers published in the Journal of the American Medical Association (December, 1999) reported that those who provide support to their spouse and are under stress are more than twice as likely to die within four years than spouses who are not serving as caregivers.

While a person cannot be much help to their loved one if they are no longer around, other less definitive and more insidious problems commonly arise. Often lost in the act of giving care is the health and well-being of the caregiver. In fact numerous studies have indicated that caregivers who do not have support are much more susceptible to a variety of illnesses ranging from getting more colds and flu to increased incidence of heart disease, digestive disorders and depression/anxiety. One's ability to care for another is obviously compromised if their own health and well being is jeopardized.

The bottom line is that the first duty of any caregiver is to care for themselves.

If you take away just one thing from this article, I hope you'll come to understand that the best way to maximize your effectiveness to your loved one is by seeking out, delegating and accepting assistance. You don't have to do everything yourself, nor should you.

Simply being able to take breaks and share responsibilities is an important first step in becoming an adept caregiver; by doing so you can be there for the long run and continue to provide the best possible care for your loved one.

Taking care of yourself, delegating responsibility and seeking assistance can take many forms based on your situation.

First and foremost take care of your own basic needs, eat well balanced meals, get enough sleep, exercise, take breaks and allow yourself some down time. While these things seem like common sense, it is important to recognize that there are many times the first things we begin to neglect when we take on a care taking role.

Equally as important, if you are experiencing health or emotional problems see your own physician as soon as possible.

Some of the common physical and emotional warning signs are:

Troubled sleep

Fatigue and exhaustion (consistently)

Frequent headaches

Mood swings

Body aches and stomach problems (frequently)

Over-reacting feeling emotionally on edge

Constant worry or anger

Changes in eating habits

Recurring colds and flu or any recurring illness

Isolation from friends and family or feeling depressed constantly

Other support systems include:

Family and friends If you don't ask they won't know what you need. This is difficult sometimes because we don't want to burden others. Remember by asking you are ultimately helping your loved one. Sometimes family members can also have conflicting ideas on what the best course of action should be.

Community and social groups There are many support groups out there for specific diseases and illnesses as well as groups for caregivers in general, many times having the support of people who are going through the same thing as yourself can be very beneficial. These other caregivers can also be a great source of information. Your local senior center or town social services agency may also be able to give you some suggestions and refer you to appropriate agencies. There are numerous local, and state funded programs for elders that can assist with support and sometimes financial assistance if you or your loved one qualifies.

Home and community care There are many home health agencies that you can hire that can provide in-home assistance and care for your loved one. There are also adult daycare center, social service programs assisted living facilities that can aid with supervision and support. Some of these services can be paid for through Medicare, Medicaid and private insurance depending on your loved ones need and financial situation.

Understanding, negotiating and coordinating all of these potential services and finding the best possible care can be a daunting task for anyone. Many people are now turning to seasoned Professional Care Managers who understand and can negotiate all of these systems.

Professional management and assistance A Professional Geriatric or Chronic Care Manager performs a comprehensive assessment, determines needs and service eligibility, develops a care plan with the family and then coordinates these services among physicians, home health care agencies, insurance, attorneys, financial advisors, other professionals and family caregivers. They also continue to monitor the status of clients and services and adjust the care plan as needed. They can be called in at any stage of the caregiver process and can many times not only save you time, money, energy and stress, but possibly prevent crisis with proactive planning.

Article submitted by Joe Makara, who has over 20 years of chronic care management experience and is founder and executive director of Compassionate Care Management, a Professional Geriatric and Chronic Care Management agency serving all of western Massachusetts. For further information, call 563-8320.